This morning was sort of an "oy vey" morning, and I'm not even Jewish, so allow me to vent a little. Now, y'all know I'm prez of my local little P.E.O. chapter. It's not bad duty, not at all. In fact, I rather enjoy it. At our upcoming meeting next week,we're planning to initiate a new member, which makes it a bit special. I'll try to explain my oy vey-ness without (a) giving away any secrets of the 'hood or (b) being absolutely boring.
For an initiation, there are certain roles that each officer has. Last week, alas, our "guard" informed me that, "
SHOOT! I forgot I'm gonna be out of town that week!"
Okay, no biggie, just get someone to fill in.
Well, she didn't. She just left me holding the empty bag. Fine, I'll find someone. One by one, each person I asked either said "no", including a load of excuses, or didn't reply until after I'd given up on them and asked someone else. I had my webcam up for skyping, and it got to be where I was opening my e-mail like this:
I understand that some people aren't comfortable getting in front of a group and such, but it's just US! Oh well, I finally went to one of the "Go To" girls, Ruby*
While I awaited her response, I was feeling grumpy in part because of (1) this guard business, and (2) the fact that I'm still a bit of a stumbling drunkard with zero blood alcohol content. Stupidly, I went over to fa(ebook.
Now, I'm not stupid enough to get into any of the political discussions, but there's this one guy I've seen on there before. Maybe others are familiar with him - he does these "tricks" where he has you manipulate numbers and dates and stuff, and then he guesses your original thought? Seen him?
His "tricks" are so lame and so figure-outable, and there was another of his videos that one of my friends had liked and shared because he got their thing correct. *
SIGH* On a side note, we all know here that "liking" a video on facebook does not "lock in your answer!", right?!
Remember that I'm a tutor and a bit of a nerd. I watched the video, and the many comments got me down. "OMG, you're amazing!"... "How do you KNOW these things?!?" ... "OMG, that's my number! Spooky!!".
Oh, Jiminy Cricket.
It made me grumpy. Thinking about how poorly the U.S. has consistently been in math in recent years. I know right?! Why should I care so much!? After all, it's job security!
So I actually left a comment, and I
never comment on such things, particularly not haterish comments. I pointed out that the "trick" was based on something we all learn (supposedly) in grade school. I even included this snarky little sticker.
So at that point, I knew I'd gone over the edge. It was time to turn that frown upside down. Thank goodness Wolfgang talked us into that gym membership, because I went to the gym to ride their bikes that go nowhere. It proved to be good therapy, plus no one mistook me for a drunk person... at least not out loud.
Eventually, I got a reply from Ruby:
Ruby: I've never done guard at initiation before...
Me:
Oh crapola, here we go again...
Ruby: ...but I'm willing to give it a try...
Me:
YES!! RU-BEE! RU-BEE! RU-BEE! *
ahem* Suffice to say, Ruby took a load off.
Then, I just happened to catch Britney Spears'
latest video for that orgasm song, because I actually happen to like the tune. Webcam still up...
She claims that the video "features lots of female empowerment".
Well, doesn't it now. Little somethin' for everybody, that one.
*
Name changed to protect the innocent