enjoy your obscurity while it lasts

Looking at my books of 2022 so far doesn't yield a whole lot.  According to my goodreads profile, I've logged a total of 8 books for the year. One of them was a GRE prep guide that I deemed "crappy" after a perusal, so I'm throwing that one out. A whopping seven books so far for the year.

Of those - stats, here they come...

⭐⭐⭐⭐ - 3 books

⭐⭐⭐       - 3 books 

⭐⭐            - 1 book

So, no total wastes of time. I'm not one of those readers who hates not to finish a book. If it's not working for me, into the DNF pile it goes. Life is short. So there were possibly more than the seven books (and the one that was Plutoed), but some never made the stats.

The book I'm reading at the moment is The Plot, and I'm finding it pretty engaging.  But I won't do a proper book review because I'm only about 50% of the way through it.

The plot of The Plot involves a struggling novelist teaching at a small humdrum MFA program. One of his students is a bit of an arrogant jerk who claims to have a "sure thing" epic plot that he's working into a novel.  The jerk eventually shares his epic plot idea with the struggling teacher.

A few years later, the struggler realizes there's no book. After a bit of digging, he learns that the arrogant jerk unexpectedly died shortly after the MFA session ended. Dun Dun Duuuuuuuun

NaTUraLly, the struggler writes a novel based on the epic plot. Novel races to the top of best seller lists. Struggler struggles no more and becomes rich and famous. Even acquires a perfect wife.

BUT, in all this glory, some anonymous person starts sending emails and posting on social media about the author being a plagiarist, stealing, and not really writing the amazing book with the epic plot, etc. Someone out there knows that the author got his idea from arrogant dead guy.

So NOW what happens?! 

Welp, I dunno, because that's where I am in my reading. 

The author's team of publicist, editor, agent, etc. all rally to shut the accuser up. They tell the author that it's a sign of success to have people trolling him like that, and he's all, "Oh, okay. Heh", while inside his mind, he's all, "omigod omigod omigod..."

So there ya go. 

Some of the lackluster reviews I've read summarized that the book starts out really good then sort of falls off the trail. There is most certainly to be a big reveal, so we'll see how "big" it actually is. I have a feeling it'll have something to do with the perfect wife.

And apparently we do eventually learn the plot within the plot of The Plot. So, two novels in one?

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Linking up this week with Mama Kat for the prompt: 
2. Book review!

ain't seen nothing yet until you're downtown

Another week down, let's reflect.

At last check in, I hadn't lost my car, was reunited with my water bottle, and acquired a free scab calculator. Not a bad week by my standards.

Yesterday, I pulled a volunteer shift at the annual Lego Creation Festival downtown. This new PEO chapter I transferred into had agreed to fill certain volunteer spots, and in return, we'd get a nice donation for our philanthropies. One of the women in my group is married to someone who has something to do with planning and running the festival, so there we were. 

one of the views from my
Lego Fest office

There were still a couple of slots open, so I blindly put my name in one. I pulled duty at the "art tent".

It was quite an easy assignment. There were Lego themed pages to color along with an assortment of markers, crayons, and scissors.

Once we got the little artists set up with their supplies, they were in the zone and not wanting to be bothered. Can't say as I blame them.

It was a very good turnout, lots of families getting their Lego on. Kinda put my faith back into humanity for a while to be around all these nice, well-behaved kids with doting parents. Neglectful, abusive parents and their traumatized kids don't attend Lego Festivals, so my view was skewed toward wholesomeness.

About an hour into our 2-hour shift, dark clouds moved in - nice to cool things down a bit. Then the rain came, another welcome guest. Then lightning, not so welcome. We were all directed to clear out until the storm moved out, and the delay was about 45 minutes. Activities resumed afterward, but the agenda had fallen behind, and my 2-hour shift turned into 3. Quite a long time to be in a Lego Fest art tent, but not horrible.

When my co-volunteer and I returned to the tent after the delay, we found an adult passing through on an e-bike had used the art tent as his shelter from the storm and was happily coloring a Lego man rendition. He eventually was overtaken by little humans and motored off into the sunset. 

be stupid, win prizes

Wednesday, I met wit a tutor student at the downtown library, and when I came out after our session, lo and behold...my car was MISSING! Seriously? Who would steal a little 2000 Toyota in the middle of the day from in front of a public building?!

The library is a decent sized building. Rather than having a designated parking lot, it has parking spaces all around the perimeter. I've only been there a few times, and usually I was on my bicycle. But yesterday, I drove there, parked, went inside, came back out, and gone. I was aghast.

When I'd arrived, it was pouring down rain. I realized that, Yay, I had an umbrella in the car, and I secured my bag o' tutor stuff before heading into the deluge and making my way into the library. 

All that to explain... I hadn't really paid attention to where I'd parked. *ahem*

The spot I coulda swore I parked in was actually around the corner from where I'd actually parked and where my little Toyota was sitting the whole time. But what a FREAK OUT! I was so happy to hunt down a thing I already owned!

Earlier in the day, I'd met with a different student at a different location: the student center at the college where I work. When I got home from that appointment, I realized I'd left my water bottle behind. Doofus. The campus lost and found happens to be right across the hall from where I work, and I know they get a ton of water bottles each semester, so surely someone would turn mine in. I'd hopefully find it across the hall when at work the next day.

But  nothing. There was one lone plastic lowly water bottle on the lost and found cart. Not mine. 

During a break in the work action, I made my way to the student center to see if there was any sign of my beloved water bottle. PFFFT, it was sitting on the table right where I'd left it the day before. 

Okay, there's not a lot of traffic in the student center since we're in summer semester. The few people going in probably saw a water bottle on a table and figured someone else was using that space. So BINGO, score another acquisition of something I already own!

Nothing special, but it had been a bicycle commuting prize from the grad school days. A Prize!

And speaking of tuting, I keep in my tutor bag a spare scientific calculator for when irresponsible careless reckless  students forget theirs. I don't want them borrowing my graphing calculator and do want them to feel the pain of not having their graphing calculators. So they can use the scab.

Well, when we moved just before COVID, my scab calculator went missing, never to be seen again. Then COVID hit and I wasn't meeting with students in person anyway. Now we're back, full face, so I asked the boss today if I could buy one of the several scientific calculators we have for people to use in the testing center. Employee deep discount used price, whatever that would be.

They're not all that expensive, but the principle of forking over for irresponsible careless reckless  students who forget to bring their own was off putting.

He thought for a second, and then said, "Y'know, back when COVID hit, the bookstore cleaned out a buncha calculators, so I got 'em. I've got a few of these that most tests don't allow, so we can't use them. You can have it."

Score! It's almost too shiny for a scab calculator. I'll have to scuff it up a bit.

Pretty good haul, I'd say. 

It's made me realize... 

a good way to solve a problem, apparently, is to first create the problem.

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Linking up this week with Mama Kat for the prompt:

4. Write a blog post inspired by the word: hunt

my big bust

And so ends another week of summer.  Today's agenda includes finding ways to beat the heat.

Yesterday, we helped Meego move a few big items from his college rental to his next address. The college "Lake House" was a good setup for the last 3 years, now it's ready for another round of students, most likely.

Meego's moving in with a friend who recently bought and is renovating a house. How a 20-something guy was able to procure a house in the current market is a bit of a mystery. But he's a nice, hardworking "kid", so more power to 'im. 

I say "we" helped move some stuff, but really, Magnum got the truck and helped load.  I was at work while that was going on and met up with them later to unload a couple of little things and check out the new place.

Speaking of work, we have two new coworkers. One, I will call Sangria. She is replacing Martha - recently left to sell everything and head for the greener grass of Mexico. Next, we acquired a work study student whom I will call Donatello. 

Both seem to fit in well and round out our little group of seven: Boss, Assistant Boss, four part-timers, and a work study.

Speaking of working yesterday, I bagged my first bust. 

We're open Mondays thru Fridays, typical business hours. And we're also open for four hours on Saturdays. Weekdays typically have 3 to 4 staffers, sometimes a work study. We all rotate the Saturday shifts, which staff two people.

So I was on yesterday with Assistant Boss. It looked to be a typical mellow Saturday, and for the most part, it was. People who came in for testing were friendly and well prepared. One woman "warned" us that she was pregnant and may have a sudden need for the restroom...

We give tests for professional certifications/ licenses, and we also administer makeup or accommodated tests for students at the college.  A college student came in for a makeup math exam, and we got him set up. His was an online exam, so we locked down his workstation so he couldn't access any websites other than his exam.

There are surveillance cameras set up at various angles to observe people while they're testing. We also have remote access to what testers have on their computer screens.  

Do we constantly watch these cameras and monitors?

Oh, heck no. Invigilation is not that invigorating.

Assistant Boss and I were hanging out, talking about our cats or something, when we noticed College Kid acting kinda suspicious - looking around at computers near him rather than his own screen. Being a Saturday, the room he was in was nearly empty. It looked suspicious, but he wasn't breaking any rules. 

Then there was this bit of activity flurry - Pregnant Lady needed the restroom, Insurance Guy left his ID behind, and Water Treatment Guy needed a score printout. 

Assistant boss signed out Pregnant Lady and got Water Treatment Guy's report while I ran down Insurance Guy in the parking lot. The dust settled, and I was sanitizing when I  happened to glance at College Kid's monitor. He had reached over to the adjacent computer, googled some math references, and was pondering his search results.

Still footage of the crime. His test is on the monitor to his right.

Alarms blared, lights flashed! We stormed the testing room, guns a-blazing!

Well... actually, Assistant Boss went in and told College Kid he can't do that while I shut down his search remotely. Redundant, because College Kid most certainly knew he can't do that. 

Meantime, we got screenshots of his googling and time stamps of how long he engaged in the covert activity. Plus, we got the video footage of the brazen scheme.

We filed the appropriate documentation and spoke with his instructor.

"Welp, he gets a zero", her wrath rang down.

Exciting times in test proctoring. Assistant Boss told me this was the first cheater caught since COVID began. Is it a sign that we've turned the corner on the pandemic?

Or as Tigger would say, "The start of a new error!"

like you used to

My first swig of booze was from my parents' liquor cabinet. I was maybe... what... ten years old or so? Ten years old and curious about the booze thing.

Gawd, it was awful. People drank that stuff voluntarily? I don't remember what it was. Something dark. Bourbon maybe. Curiosity satisfied, I put that sh*t back in the cabinet and never touched it again.

Eventually, I made it to high school where drinking was a means to an end. Taste? What did that have to do with anything? We're only doing this to get blasted/ hammered/ smashed/ trashed/ etc., right?

I recall drinking horrible rum and cokes mixed by stupid teenagers (me and my friends) while in a gas station parking lot . One guy noted, "This tastes like Flintstone's Chewables". By George, he was right. Then there was Jungle Juice. Remember Jungle Juice?

Now, I was not a super partier by any means as a teen, but did my fair share of giving into the peer pressure for something to do. Ours was a small town, booze was easy to come by and made for lasting memories I suppose.  Bonding by hair-holding.  

Having drunk enough paint-thinner tasting concoctions by the time I was of legal age, I'd already pretty much lost interest.  Also, going in to work the morning after a night of drinking is surely made more difficult with age.

Playing some drinking game
with fellow poor friends during
the college years

I went to a university known for partying, but those were rich kid affairs - Sororities and Fraternities. I went to a Frat party or two, but never drank much at them. I mainly observed and wondered who was going to clean everything up. So much sticky.

Between classes and my part-time job, I really didn't have money or time for such things anyway.

I did very little to add to the party statistics of my school. 

Next thing I knew, I was an adult. Had a husband, mortgage, kids... 
I enjoy a nice glass of wine or beer or mixed drink on occasion in social situations. But I can't recall  the last time I would've fallen into the "drunk" category, let alone "blasted/ hammered/ smashed/ trashed".

To my kids, apparently, I am super clean and a major lightweight - or maybe "light flyweight" to use a boxing analogy.  I guess they have it in their minds that I never drink other than "maybe a halfa beer on a weekend".

I found this out at Meego's recent college graduation. He and his fellow grads/roommates hosted the potluck bash at their rental house. I sipped some champagne and a bit of beer.

Eventually, the shot ski came out, and Meego and I bellied up to join one of his roommates and roommates mom. 

L to R: Meego, Abby, Roommate, Roommate's mom

Omigosh, the cautionary advice that ensued from Chaco and Wolfgang! Which booze to allow in my shot glass, expectations, something I can handle, etc. It's like they imagined me stumbling about and peeing myself after one go at the shot ski. 

Anyways, the ONE shot I did was Deep Eddy Lemonade Vodka. I rather enjoyed it, and imagine it wouldn't have taken much more for me to become "blasted/ hammered/ smashed/ trashed". In truth, I am a lightweight, but not so squeaky clean.

I'd say it's probably a good thing I started my alcohol journey with that moonshine tasting crap we concocted in high school. 

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Linking up this week with Mama Kat for the prompt:
4. Write a blog post inspired by the word: clean

furries

I was enjoying an indulgent bicycle joyride earlier this week, rounded a corner, and oh deer. 

She decided she didn't want to socialize with me and left, but not before I was able to snap a quick pic.

I'm done with COVID, or it's done with me as well as the rest of the family. Because of the 4th of July holiday, I only missed one day of work. My coworkers expressed their appreciation and bestowed this card upon my return.

Inside says "Mew got this!" because we're all a bit crazy cat people.

They joked that the original intent was to mail it to my sick bed, but since I survived, they just handed it to me.

Boss said, "We talked and realized: you ride your bike to work, exercise, eat healthy foods, and you're the first of us to get COVID. So yeah, we're not gonna do any of that stuff"

Meanwhile, we also had three dogs for a week. Chaco's dog stayed with us while he was out of town, so some extra walking time. Ella's a good pooch, and I think Merlin was mildly depressed when she left to go back home.

Speaking of pets and crazy cat people, coworker Party Girl got a cat for her cognitively challenged dad. He loves the cat, but isn't so good at taking care of her. In the meantime, Party Girl has one dog, and her husband had made it clear from the get go that he doesn't want any more pets.  

He's smart enough to see that this is Party Girl's backdoor way of getting a cat. The plot thickens. Who will prevail?

Oh... the drama.

meaningful

Happy 5th of July. I'm glad to be over the hump that is Independence Day in the US. I engaged in nothing celebratory, and it was another day of homeboundness.

I don't typically like to be at home so much and am not used to it. My house is now quite clean as cleaning has become an activity of choice to help chase the quarantine boredom and also get some payoff.  I'm feeling reasonably well now, but still testing positive on the home test.

And I can't smell a darn thing.

I noticed yesterday, while I was (naturally) cleaning, that the Windex didn't smell like anything. Windex typically has a distinct smell, but this time, it had no smell whatsoever.  So I then began smell testing my other cleaning supplies and got a whole lot of nothing. Even smelling white distilled vinegar was like smelling tap water. Odd feeling.

My sense of taste seems to slowly be returning, so I'm hoping the same will eventually kick in for my smell buds.  In the meantime, I've spokenn with the "COVID response team" at work, and I'm cleared to return as long as:

• I no longer have symptoms
• it's been at least 5 days since the onset of symptoms

Technically, I've still got the lack-of-smell thing going on, but they brush that one aside. 

So my next scheduled shift is this Thursday, and I'll be back at it. 🙂

But enough of Tales of the Infirm.  I don't harbor hatred for my job. It's no dream job, but it's a good fit for now. One recent day, Assistant Boss asked me if I would do his job for x-amount of money.

"PFFFT, no!", I was quick to reply.  I thought he was joking because we'd just dealt with an annoying technical issue. I felt he was playing all, "I'm out, you take over!"

But then I realized he was being serious. So I asked him, "Why? You leaving?"

He went on to explain his question by suggesting that Boss is probably on the brink of retiring, and he - Assistant Boss - would go for the Boss position, thereby creating an opening for Assistant Boss.  Would I want it?

Honestly, my answer is still "PFFFT, no!", but I told him I would consider it when/ if the time came.

I've found that most professions I would enjoy doing full-time require recent work experience and/or education that I don't have. I don't want to put money into more education at this point since I'm 57 years old, and a fresh degree/ license/ certificate is no guarantee of fulfilling full-time employment. I'm not ready to "retire".

I'm okay with the present compromise - a couple of decent side gigs in lieu of a fully satisfying front gig and time to wander around with dogs and to prattle away on this blog. 

loving ewe

Since succumbing to the crud that is covid, I've used my downtime to better myself. 

HA, LIKELY STORY.

I think I've increased my daily reading time a bit, but I've also spent some time watching what has turned out to be rather educational programming.

Clarkson's Farm, heard of the show? It's on Amazon Prime Video and hosted by Jeremy Clarkson, who is apparently well known for shows like "Top Gear" (I know not of it). Anyway, he becomes the owner of a 1,000-acre farm and decides to give it a go even though he knows nothing about farming. 

The show is both educational and entertaining. I particularly enjoy the bits about sheeping where the show follows Jeremy as he chooses and purchases nearly 80 sheep at auction, attempts to herd them with a drone (doesn't work), hires two rams to impregnate the herd, and then takes part in the lambing season.

WATCH SOME LAMBING HERE

I've learned some things like how sheep rams are basically sperm factories, ewes "need" to be part of a flock, sheep are surprisingly nimble, and ewes can be tricked into thinking another ewe's lamb is their own.  

I do now feel guilty about having eaten lamb and will likely never knowingly eat it again, but the show is well done and passes the time for the quarantined infirm like myself.

As far as my reading, I've been working my way through "Under the Banner of Heaven", Jon Krakaur's book about Mormon Fundamentalists and the murder of a woman and her child in the name of God. 

We lived for nearly 4 years in Utah among the Mormons. Polygamy was joked about, but it was also understood that it wasn't all joking.  

And now reading about the Fundamentalist's teachings while also learning about sheep farming, I notice many parallels between Fundamentalist Mormon women/ girls and sheep. 😳

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Linking up this week with Mama Kat for the prompt:

4. Share something you learned in June.