Wednesday, August 12, 2015

thanks for the nosebleed

Remember last summer?  The summer of the bees?  Boy, I do.

Let me briefly refresh...
Over a span of about a week and a half, I was bee stung three times.

Exhibit A

Exhibit A shows sting result number 1.

Clearly, that kamikaze bee was going for the jugular.

Exhibit B

Exhibit B shows sting result number 2.

Knowing I'm right-handed, that kamikaze bee was obviously seeking to render me helpless.

Last, but certainly not least, was sting result number 3.  Out of blog appropriateness, I have no Exhibit C as that kamikaze bee got me square in the chest, the result of which was the development of an awkward third boob. 

Just take my word for it when I say that sting number three was the MOST disfiguring of them all *ahem*.

So far this summer, I have remained stingless (knock on wood!  Hear me knocking, bees??), but I fear that I'm still being stalked.

Monday, I gave Meego a ride to work.  He got a bloody nose just before leaving and was afraid he'd be late if he rode his bike so I drove him.  As we got into the van, he noticed a wasp buzzing around his window.  We didn't think much of it and just drove off.

Later that afternoon, when I went to pick him up, we once again noticed a wasp buzzing around the passenger window after he got in the van.  Hmmm... how curious...

We pondered what this all meant for a moment, and we saw the wasp fly into the housing behind the passenger side mirror.  I moved the mirror around, but it never emerged.  Okay, whatever.

Then we got home and had a look:

Can I get a collective, "EEWWWW!!" ?  

Those little moochers had built a house in the mirror of the van and were multiplying!

I googled like a madwoman to figure out the best remedy.  In the end, we waited until after sundown and sprayed those buggers instantly dead.  We were a bit concerned about the poison messing up the paint and/or the wiring inside the mirror, but neither turned out to be an issue.  

This is what's left of their dead planet:

 Meego got a bit of video.  The actual killing didn't get recorded - something to do with pushing "pause" when meaning to push "record" and vice versa...

ANYWAY, may they rest in peace... and Leave.  Me.  Alone.




LL Cool Joe said...

Blimey Meego was brave to film it! So I get the impression you don't use the van that often? Glad you haven't been stung so far this year, a third boob doesn't sound as fun as it should. :D

Abby said...

At that time of day, the wasps were actually pretty groggy and pretty easy to film. My full coverage outfit proved to not be necessary.

And you're right on both counts: the van doesn't get a whole lot of action, and neither did that third boob.

agg79 said...

wow. Those wasps must really have a "thing" for you.

Pretty ballsy of Meego to get up close and personal with them. I assume YOU did the dispatching. I have no love for those winged demons and woulda nuked them with wasp spray. Funny how my trailer will occasionally collect a few nests in the water heater compartment. It has made me cautious whenever I open the compartments lest I get a nasty surprise party.

On a side note, didn't I recall something about an anniversary?

Guano said...

Objects In Mirror Are Creepier Than They Appear!!

Abby said...

Actually, Magnum was the trigger man. I was just there to watch them die.

And yes! We had an old married couple's anniversary this week. I was thinking of Agg Jr. and his lovely bride :)

Abby said...

Even in death, they are still giving me the creeps!

ShadowRun300 said...

Ewww! I've seen wasp nests in many places, but never in a car mirror. Ewww!
You've just about made it through the summer with no stings! You got this!
(And Happy Anniversary! Nothin' says true love like killing a nest of wasps for you.)

Abby said...

I told Meego I was glad he had that nosebleed, or who knows when we would've noticed! And yes, dead wasps and a dormant hive made a nice anniversary gift.

terri said...

In the mirror??? That's crazy!

Then again, your family seems to commute so much on two wheels, I guess your four wheeled vehicles sit still long enough for bees to assume they might be a stable home base.

I've managed to avoid bee stings most of my adult life. Maybe I don't smell appealing to them and that's okay with me. But we get plenty of similar nests in and around the siding and roof peaks of our house. We are very familiar with the bee killing spray.

Hope you remain happily stingless for the remainder of the season!

Riot Kitty said...

God, that's just creepy.