Friday, September 23, 2011

pain and suffering

Okay, apparently yesterday was kids-injure-themselves-at-the-crosswalk-day, and nobody told me.

It started in the morning when one of my regular customers tripped and landed on a chunk of cement.  I hate when that happens.

He's a tough little guy, though, and a few soothing words from the siblings and me helped to stanch the downpour.  Soon, he was up and walking and ready for another day at the kindergarten grind.

Afternoon brought more carnage. 

I was walking a group across when I noticed, out of the corner of my eye, one particular daredevil approaching on his bicycle.  I was in the middle of the road, keeping one eye on the current crossers, another eye on the might-misbehave-at-any-moment traffic, and another third(?) eye on bicycle boy.  I had a feeling that he might decide to go for it and try to beat the light, and I was having none of that.

However, I didn't have to tell him to stop, the ground did that for me.  I actually think he's got a sh*tty rear brake on his bicycle and so usually just uses his feet and/or his front brake.  Anyway, out of the corner of my third eye, I see him do an end-over-end at the bottom of the hill approaching the crosswalk.

Much wailing and writhing promptly ensued.  And ensued and ensued and ensued.

He was balled up in a heap, doubled over in pain and not responding to my questions as to what hurt.  But the wailing told me that he was at least conscious and breathing. 

Turns out he took the end of a hand grip to the gut.  That's not easy to do.  At first, because of his position and his non-response, I was afraid he may have taken it in the crotch, but eventually he was able to show me the point of contact.  It was where his uterus would be if he were a girl. 

And all this with cars buzzing by and kids heading home from school and wanting to cross the street.  Oh the excitement. 

Eventually, everyone got headed in their proper directions.  Dad came to retrieve bicycle boy who did not show at the crosswalk this morning. 

This moonlighting is getting intense.

1 comment:

  1. Wow! Do you have to be certified in first aid to be the crossing guard now? May be a good thing...