I'm going to invoke Joey's call for a Weekend Wobbly, renaming it a "Wednesday Wobbly". This is aimed at the vampire bee that attacked me yesterday, although he's most certainly dead by now.
There I was, enjoying my ride home on a lovely day when, from my left blazed a kamikaze vampire bee! I have no idea what I did to provoke him, but I think, based on the attack, he'd been plotting this for a while. He probably stalked me for days. That's what I get for not varying my route.
So I was just happily riding along, and WA-PANG!, that vampire dive-bombed me and rammed his stinger right into my neck, probably going for my jugular! I was shocked out of my calm, and sent into all, WTH?! mode.
My initial thought was that I'd been hit by a bee, yeah okay. But then I could feel that telltale sign of bee poison pumping into my body and was all, "It dive-bombed me, stinger first??" So I scratched at the site while continuing to pedal in order to remove any such stinger. The pumping sensation abated, so I figured I got it.
Then I lodged into all worse-case-scenario mode. I am a bit sensitive to bee stings, but nothing too serious. But who knows when I might get sensitive enough and go into full
To make matters worse (in my mind), yesterday, I uncharacteristically had forgotten to bring my wallet in my bike bag. I NEVER forget my wallet, but yesterday I somehow did. So I was already in a bit of a panic. What if I got a flat? What if I crashed? What if....? I had no money, no identification. I would end up a puffed up, homeless Jane Doe!
Plus, I had to go tute in a couple of hours, it would take me nearly that long just to walk home from where I was! But as I got closer to home, my panic subsided. I'd also realized that if I was going to get all puffed up and die, it would've happened by then.
I was certain that there was no stinger doing mean things to me anymore. In fact, I don't think the stinger had gotten embedded very well in the first place, so it had released its grip pretty readily, sending only a mini amount of vampire bee venom.
When I first got home, it was hardly even noticeable.
This morning, it's a bit more lumpy
As I said, I don't know what I did to provoke him, maybe he was just having a bad month and I was a handy target. So let me just say that I do appreciate the bees of the world. For their contributions to the continuation of humankind and for their impressive work ethic. My computer is even named "Clover" (but that's kind of another story).
Rest In Peace, kamikaze Vampire Bee.
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12 comments:
Ouch. Firstly thanks for the shout out. Yes feel free to have a wobbly anytime of the week! Strangely enough I got strung by a bee this week too, and mine crawled up the sleeve of my top, stung me and then stayed there for half an hour before I realised. I thought because I was outside gardening a thorn or something had pierced my skin. Anyway, like you, I can have bad reactions to bee stings but was okay in fact less of a swelling than you. Have you any cream you can apply?
Ooch, crawled up your sleeve? What's with these bees being on the offensive?!
Mine seems to be evolving. Today it feels like there's a fat patch of overdone ground chuck sitting just below the surface of my skin, which itches like crazy. I put some extra strength Gold Bond on, but I don't think it did much. Suggestions?
I now realize how gullible I am, because I honestly thought a bat had attacked you in broad daylight. I never leave home without my I.D. and my insurance card. Even bloated and flailing about in agony, no hospital would even spit on me without proof of insurance.
Bees always come after me! I hope it doesn't hurt too bad. Stings tend to linger for a while and be sore (I almost wrote BEE sore but decided not to....)
Yikes! That is definitely deserving a midweek wobbly! I've hit lots of bugs while running and biking and motorcycling, but I've never had one bombard me. But who knows? Maybe friends of the bugs I hit are out there stalking me and planning their revenge. Looks like I'll be taking a different route tomorrow.....
Sure hope you're feeling better. I can only imagine how much it must itch you today. My mom always used a paste of baking soda and water on me. Can't remember if it worked or not, but maybe it's worth a try?
A BAT! Creepy! And it would be just my luck to get bitten by one when I didn't have my insurance card on me.
Well, it does bee sore...
Magnum says that maybe I ran into the bee - since it hit me butt first, and all. Why would I run into a bee?! From my point of view, IT divebombed ME. To add insult to injury, another one did the same to my hand the next day. Flying backwards?? Must be a gang!
My mom put Vick's on them, but she put Vick's on everything. I understand it's a Filipino thing...
Well hell. I just re-read your post and you SAID vampire BEE, but I saw, VAMPIRE BAT. Joe has been saying I need an eye exam. I just got one for next week due to this post..........arghh
OUCH. Hope you feel better soon!
Well, geeze! Right in the neck! That was rude of him! I'm glad you didn't suffer any serious complications and don't feel too sorry for the kamikaze vampire bee.
I thought I'd backtrack to see how your bee saga began. When you posted this, I'll bet you never even imagined that you'd be victimized again - and so soon.
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