Thursday, November 10, 2016

bad case of lovin' you

I had my annual "Well Woman Check" today at the doctor's.  In addition to the pedometer and activity points, it's required homework in order to receive health incentive moulah from Magnum's employer.

I was a bit apprehensive about the appointment.  Not because of impending doom diagnosis, but because I hadn't done my assignments from last time, namely mammogram and colonoscopy.  The health incentive people didn't say I had to actually FOLLOW THROUGH on my doctor's instructions, I just had to go see her.

And here we were, a year later.

So, naturally these things came up during the visit.  I stammered out a few excuses and good intentions like my classes and how they will be finished very soon, and so I will then have lots of free time to spend on purging my bowels and getting squished and scoped up to my eyeballs.  Looking forward to it all like a vacation.

Dr. seemed satisfied with that, and the visit went fine from there.  So I thought I'd take a moment to count some blessings.

8.  I'm "well"!

This was a well-woman check, which can sometimes feel like an annoying time-waster.  But then I look at some others in the waiting room and think,  "sucks to be you today".

7.  My doctor is very laid back

She's been my doctor for, I dunno, 3 or 4 years since my previous laid back doctor moved.  She's married with a coupla kids and doesn't intimidate at all despite the white coat to contrast with my fashionable "paper gown open in front and lap drape".  Smart enough to be a doctor, but personable enough to make jokes with.

6.  I have "boring pee"

As Dr. clicked through my lab results, she noted my "boring pee".  This is a good thing, apparently, despite the technical medical jargon.

5.  Pap smear, y'all!

There's a blessing here somewhere, I know there is.

4.  Coffee

I had to fast for the blood work, which meant getting myself to the doctor's with no morning caffeine.  I don't like that I  need morning caffeine, but I seemingly do need it and am so glad to have access to it now.

3.  Food

See number 4.

2.  Funny things on the wall of the blood-sucking room

Yeah, he had this one, along with an assortment of others.

1.  Leonard
Leonard is the phlebotomist.  When I arrived for the blood-sucking, he sat me down then went about looking confusedly at some papers on the counter.  Then he confusedly went about  picking up other papers and supplies.  Then he went back to the papers on the counter.  Then he looked over at  me and said.

"Whachyer name?"

So I'm thinking *wonder if he's on drugs??* and told him my name.

"Oh, okay", Leonard says.  And then, "You look younger than what your paperwork says, I thought you were someone else"

All my Leonard misgivings instantly vanished.  He's my number one today.



Linking up again with MamaKat for the prompt:
3. Write a list of 8 things you are thankful for


  1. OH. MY. This is the funny I needed today. I am laughing so hard. You know, I actually just got back from getting my blood drawn today and I feel ya on the don't eat or drink anything. I didn't have any coffee and the waiting room was jammed packed. It was far too early to function on no coffee and follow instructions on how to "pull a ticket, scan the ticket, and take a seat". I just stood there like a wounded animal until a little old lady did it for me. I'm not even lying. I NEED COFFEE.
    Thanks for the laugh!!!

    1. If the zombie apocalypse happens, I'm taking my machete and going on a coffee run.

  2. Replies
    1. I'm thinking of putting Leonard in my will.

  3. I hate the fasting thing. We always try to go out to breakfast after we get blood drawn. By that time, we really need coffee.

    1. It's awful, isn't it? It's a wonder I made it back home before serious withdrawal.

  4. Well I'm glad you are well and that you were told you look young. That must have made your day.

    1. Leonard did mention an accident he had with a rake before work. It probably impaired his judgement, but whatever works!

  5. Maybe you can switch to a new laid back doctor and get by without going for another 3-4 years. That's what I'd do.
    I am dreading a colonoscopy because I can't bear the thought of not eating or drinking what I want for a WHOLE day. That's seriously the reason. I'll get blood work done, but it's gotta be early. Like way before my body realizes I'm awake and wants coffee.

    1. I have no qualms at all about the colonoscopy itself, but not eating for a whole day?! I hear ya!

  6. The mammo is easy peasy. Start with that one and get in there, Girl! :)

    You gotta watch those phlebotomists - Leonard was probably happier giving the compliment than you were getting it.

  7. I'm glad it went well!! I hate that shameful feeling of not completing my homework too, but they seemed to put up with you regardless. ;)

    1. Dr. actually told me she's bad about that stuff to. Win!

  8. I was afraid of the needle. And now I have to inject myself daily with insulin.
    Go God!