Wednesday, November 9, 2011

things I will say

I was just over Here and this entry resonated with me a lot.  It was written from a prompt to "Pour Your Heart Out".

Okay, enough linking...

As I have confessed, I recently began talking with a get-a life coach.  I mean, seriously though.  Who does that??  It was a few weeks ago, and I was feeling restless, like there should be more to "this".  So I started surfing the internet about life coaching - thinking maybe I could find a good forum or a newsletter or something.

Here's the thing.  I consider myself to be pretty happy and content with how my life is going.  On the surface it seems great.  Married forever 21 years to a patient and employed Magnum, 3 healthy kids, the house, the cars, the pets, the hobbies...

So why the restlessness?   All these years, since Chaco was in kindergarten, I've been a busy volunteer mom at schools, at youth sports, all that stuff.  And now I've got time and energy for other things.  But... what things?

And to be honest, I feel taken for granted and resentful sometimes.  And to be honest, I feel like I've lost some of "me" in the last few years. 

First of all, if you just go and naively do a search on "life coaching", you will get about a gajillion links.  Not helpful.  I made my search words more and more and more and more specific, until I whittled the list down to a mere gazillion. 

So I ended up checking out a few of the sites.  Now, I've read a few books before about finding your way, awakening your giant, coloring your parachute, etc...  As I perused around, I think I came to realize that it's tough to life coach your own self.  For me it is anyway.

I clicked a button to sign up for a complementary session.  My coach lives in Buffalo.  We skyped.

And from that one free skyped session, I felt a little better.  Not to sound all new agey and such, but she asks "powerful questions" to align with who we really are and get rid of the stuff that gets in our way.

She described this process as being like driving.  "Therapy is looking in the rear-view mirror.  Counseling is pulling over to ask directions.  Life coaching is focusing on the road ahead.  And sometimes, we have to check the rear view mirror and we might need to pull over and ask directions, but the focus is on moving forward". 

Sounded good to me.

Stay tuned.


Guano said...

"...I've lost some of "me" in the last few years..."
We all have, Honey. Raising good kids sucks the life outta ya.

And if it's any consolation, that's the way it's supposed to be.

MissKris said...

Amen, Guano. I've put in 35 years with my two kids and I've been at it for over 5 with my two little grandsons who I do full-time day care for. It can suck the juice right out of you...but in retrospect it was worth every sip on the straw. I have two amazing adult children and two amazing little grandsons. I can be proud of that.

"Abby" said...

Gee, I don't really see it that way. In a lot of ways, being a mom made me more "me" than I was before. Best j-o-b I've ever had.

terri said...

I get this. I think the reason I struggle so much lately with my own life is that I loved the part where I took care of everyone and they needed me - especially the last few years. The teenage years were good around here.

Still following your life-coaching stuff with much interest!