So... my Dad passed away yesterday.
All in all, this was not a surprise. And given his rough Sunday night, we all figured this could be "It". It's somewhat comforting to know that this is what he's actually wanted for a while. He wasn't sad or depressed, he was just ready for the next phase.
So while a large part of me is very sad, another part of me is relieved and thinking, "wow, he did it".
We got close to two feet of snow beginning Sunday evening. Most everything has been shut down for two days, and Meego has yet a third snow day today. I was hoping Dad would still be around, and I would go down to see him on Friday as the weather forecast looked good.
I'm just so happy to have my many memories of him. Our conversations, especially in this past year, have been special. Before my mom passed, when I called, he would talk with me for a bit and then, "Here, let me give the phone to your mother".
He was a deep thinker, enjoyed long walks, and loved good conversation. He had no patience for small talk. As a running joke, I would sometimes greet him with, "How are you?(don't wait for an answer) How 'bout those Broncos!?"
A friend of mine yesterday said that grief is not something we go through and then come out the other side like we were before. It's something we absorb and it becomes part of us forever.
That's what I'm doing. I'm absorbing. And looking forward to going on walks again with Dad.